New Beginnings

It's been quite a long time since my last post. Not much has changed...age has crept up, few more pounds and wrinkles, less time spent with family as our kids pursue their lives and interests, struggling somewhat with our "empty nest" season. Being a mother for so many years...that was my purpose...and now...that role has changed as my children no longer need their mother as they did as they were growing up. What do I do with that? How do I relate to my adult children?? It seems I have lost that purpose in my life..a role I loved and knew well. Now what? That has been a on-going question and struggle for a few years and have just recently discovered other women struggling with this same season of life. It seems strange that it has been a struggle by many done in silence until just now. Such silence brings loneliness and a sense of being left behind & forgotten.

The good news...we have found a wonderful church family that we love and respect. The worship is sweet...the people are servants at heart both to the church body as well as to the community...and the teaching is excellent with an emphasis on God's Truth. It is within this body of believers that I have discovered the need for women who have entered the 'empty nest' portion of their lives and seem to need the fellowship of others for help, encouragment, support, and good teaching on how to respond to this process in a Godly way. We are at the beginning of this new season in which we will be meeting together to learn God's purpose for each of us during this transition.

I started this post with the intention of remembering the son I lost 14 years ago today, but strangely my thoughts went to other places. However, it all fits together, for the death of my son was the beginning of all these changes that have taken place. I feel deep sadness today over the losses...and need to acknowledge that pain here. It hurts...it's sad. I ache for Joey, wanting to hear his voice that has been so silent for so long. That's my mother's heart. Yet...I also know without a doubt that he is with his heavenly Father and is no longer in pain...no tears...no sadness...no sickness...just absolute beautiful bliss being in the presence of the Lord. For that I am deeply grateful....even in my sadness.

I know that God has His purpose in all things and my part is to trust Him fully in His Plan. I cannot in my finite mind even begin to understand all His ways, but I can trust Him fully...His Love...His mercy...His Grace. He never promised things would be easy, but in all of life's events...tragedies...hardships...sufferings, He did promise to be there with us to help us through those times. He has been my strength in my weakness...He has been and is my Comforter. When I can keep my mind on Him, there is hope.

For now...today...God is with me in my grief.
Remembering Joey (1967-1997): Your brothers love you; Mom and Dad love you: we truly miss you. You are with God and we find comfort in knowing that. Until we meet...